I know what it is to live entirely for and with what I love best on earth.-Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë

Mona's Musings

April 23rd, 2010

Something’s ____ing

“The world is a puzzle and we’re two pieces that fit perfectly together.” – Author Unknown

We stroll across the campus of our alma mater. Actually, calling it our alma mater is a little presumptuous since we never actually graduated. But lucky for us, we just happen to be in town thirty years later–visiting our kids who are getting degrees–when we get the call that Dale’s college transcript is required to complete the Visa process. So, all it takes is this little walk and $2.00 to settle a dispute between the United States of America and Great Britain.

No sooner has the twenty-something behind the window handed us the paper, but Dale questions whether it’s worth the two bucks. There are so many starts and stops on that paper; it reads more like a bus schedule than a college transcript. We belly laugh and wonder outloud: what in the world were we thinking?! It’s hard to remember. What we do remember is that, for us, the final school bell rang when our first baby was born severely disabled; her care required daddy to carry four jobs to pay for the therapy that mommy carried out 24/7.  To leave off school for her sake was the first crossroads decision we ever made—the first of ten thousand million trillion.

Shall we try a new job? Do we pay the taxes or the mortgage? Is the opportunity worth a move to another state? What about another baby? Woops. Too late. There are so many decisions of significance in marriage that I shudder to think of making them alone. We woke up one morning and I was foolish but he was wise and then two nights later he was impetuous and and I was careful followed by six days of my emotion and his logic: back and forth, round and round, up and down: we balanced each other out and filled in the gaps.

I’m trying to pack our bags to leave the old college town.

“Look at this hotel room,” I say, “All our clothes are hither and yon.”

“That’s us,” he agrees. “You’re hither and I’m yon.”

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HINT OF ROMANCE: Two heads are almost always better than one. And two hearts will never be one without believing that.

*** SOMETHING’S MISSING ***

[youtube width=”300″ height=”250″]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgMvLuLSkwk[/youtube]

Ice cream coupons for your next date to the first Muser who can tell me what makes this excerpt from The Muppet Show particularly suited to Mona’s Musings!

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Don’t miss: Does This Seem Strange to You?

Official London Forecast:

My honey’s gone to London to “let” us a flat” from a “negotiator”…which may be tricky since there is no multiple-listing service AND I’d prefer TWO bathrooms. (See Wendy’s comment on “Love Makes the World Go Round“…)

Hint of Romance

Two heads are almost always better than one. And two hearts will never be one without believing that.

What did you think of this musing?

Join the discussion!

Discussion

  1. Wendy Scarlett says:

    Well Mona
    The first thing is the picture of Mona Lisa in the background.
    Secondly the song talks about “something missing when your not near me” and “Nothings missing when you are near”
    Now if that isnt romantic what is!!
    Thanks for posting

    • mona says:

      Wendy — YOU ARE THE WINNER! How appropriate that a resident of the United Kingdom should grab the prize! I might add that you had the distinct advantage of being several hours ahead of U.S. musers. What ice cream parlors do you have in the UK? I am an addict.

  2. Heidi says:

    I always loved this song from the show. And Mona–you’re on the back wall!

    I love the hither and yon comment. :-)

    • mona says:

      Heidi: I didn’t really finish what Dale actually said. After he made the “hither and yon” crack, he added: “At least we’re not null and void!”

      Sue: To the contrary — I never claimed that we knew EVERYTHING between us – as can be ascertained by a review of our attempts to sell houses at peak market — however, we at least always reached consensus – and THAT is “everything”. You are so right about teamwork.

  3. Sue Simper says:

    Oh, it’s just like I was saying yesterday: Between you and Dale, you know EVERYTHING!

    I think it’s been fun to see, in our marriage, who rises to fill in the blanks on things neither of us had a talent for on our own – but, hey – somebody’s gotta do it! (Like finances, etc.) Weaknesses really can become strengths working as a team!

  4. Bri Z says:

    Also, your son sang it to your daughter-in-law at their very romantic wedding reception! :) he he.

    It reminds me of how perfectly men and women compliment each other. Not only are we sometimes opposite in our reasoning – girls are not the only ones who can be emotional – but we also have distinct gifts and roles to perform. Sometimes those roles flip-flop when the world is spinning a little topsy-turvy which is why “it takes two baby!”

    • mona says:

      Bri: I’d forgotten that – that he’s sung it at the reception. Perfect. I like your idea of “flip-flop” (like hither and yon!)

  5. Lisa says:

    My transcript reads like a bus schedule, too. Life happens, and that’s okay.

  6. Wendy Scarlett says:

    Hi Mona

    I was delighted to get your email telling me I was the winner. Sad to say we do not have the ice cream palour chains here in the UK that you have stateside. Perhaps you could send the vouchers to the early bird stateside!
    I am happy to know I was on the right track.
    Dont panic there are wonderfule Italian ice cream shops here and there that are just wonderful so you will survive whilst here in the UK.

    • mona says:

      Wendy: May we make a date for Italian ice cream with you and yours?!?!

      Sara Lyn: You win the consolation prize! Which is…..hmmm…..I set it down here somewhere! Oh! There it is! The remains of a bowl of ice cream enjoyed in YOUR honor!

      Rebecca: Cute AND true?!

  7. Sara Lyn says:

    Cute song! I felt proud of myself that I had thought of both things Wendy listed before I saw her answer. :) I am grateful for the balance that Morgan brings to me. And with Heidi, I loved the hither and yon statement. (Especially with the addition of the null and void.) :) Love you.

  8. Rebecca Webb says:

    Super cute! And so true!

  9. Serene says:

    Ha ha, cute song!

    As much as I most certainly didn’t realize it at first and thought that Luke and I just might not be all that compatible, I realize that we GREATLY balance each other out. We have both brought out buried treasures in each other that couldn’t have been reached without a whole lot of… refining. =)

  10. Hannah says:

    I was chatting with a couple of friends the other day, and the discussion started turning to the topic of marriage and a couple’s social life. Both of these girls felt that it is great to be independent and married at the same time. They felt that couples should be able to do their own thing, advance their own careers, and pursue their own goals separately, but still be in love.

    Really?

    I couldn’t believe my ears. I didn’t quite know what to say. I find this very sad that many single adults and married adults think this is how a marriage should be. Is marriage just turning to a piece of legally signed papers? Yeah we have a piece of paper and we are “in love”, but isn’t something’s missing? Marriage is becoming ONE – MERGING. Not only is the spouse missing if they focus only on their wants and try to be both independent and married, but UNITY is missing. That unity creates a full measure of love, devotion, and oneness. That unity creates power, generates change, and produces true and real accomplishments. We will only feel truly fulfilled when we are ONE, one in love, in spirit, in goals, with nothing missing.

  11. Sarah says:

    This was the sweetest sketch ever! Who knew The Muppet Show had marriage morals to it? I guess I didn’t watch the show very much.

    I’m SO excited about my honey and the compliment he is for me! I’m SO BLESSED! I LOVE that guy.

  12. Chris says:

    Hannah, why can’t a couple have a goal to advance in their respective careers? They can’t help each other out with that? Your friends’ feelings are correct, and pretty normal. Lots of very much in love people and happy people in the world who are also able to get ahead in their jobs and “do their own thing.”

    Just not really sure why you can’t do both. Not every relationship fits a specific mold. Every couple is different, and every love is unique, and I don’t know how much it helps to judge your friends for wanting something different than you do.

    • mona says:

      Chris: You are right of course. Two independent people can be very happily married and in fact, I believe are more satisfied when they are supporting one another pursuing their dreams. In the case Hannah is referring to, the situation her friends were discussing involved a choice that the married couple had to make about living apart (faaaaar apart) while pursuing separate career goals. That is a conundrum for a lot of couples today and I’m just glad I am not the one dealing with it.

  13. Bill says:

    I read an article a while back about spouses sleeping in separate rooms from each other because of a number of different factors: sleep schedule, snoring, temperature preferences, etc. Many found when they could get better rest, they were happier in their marriage. The idea of sleeping in separate rooms doesn’t appeal to me, in fact on the few occasions when we have, I have been miserable. I really did feel that something was ____ing. I really can’t imagine living far apart for an extended length of time. I think it takes an especially committed relationship and strength of character to make it work. When spending significant time apart and being busy with demanding careers, many people could become accustomed to the absence of the other.

    Amber and I have some goals and plans, and so far we are doing pretty good at staying on track. But sometimes with money, she worries that things will come up that require us to alter those plans. The thing I try to tell her though is that we will get through it. We’ll make any necessary changes, and develop new goals, but we’ll do it together.

    • mona says:

      Bill: Wow. You’ve caught me on a day when I’m more than overwhelmed with change. If you look at past musings, you will see how I have struggled with change this year, so I sympathize with Amber. But, Bill, your attitude is exactly what she needs to hear: that her man will be with her and protect her no matter what; that together you can adjust to any circumstance and beat the odds if you have to; and that, with faith, everything works out. That’s what women need to hear and believe. (Pssst…repeatedly.)

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